Jodechi's blog
Healing using Skype
Monday 19th of July 2010
It's finally here. We finally have Skype. Thank goodness. We have had to wait for a faster broadband connection to arrive in our area. We love living in such an isolated, rural area but it does have it's challenges.
Now I can finally see my clients that I have been only able to talk to for so long. Eliot and I had our first Skype video call on Saturday and it was such fun. Honestly- we were squealing and giggling like little children. Glad it was with our much trusted friend Ian- like to keep it in the family that we are both a little techno geeky.
I know many of you have probably had Skype for years and this seems a bit silly but go back and remember the first time you were on your computer and you were able to see the person you were talking too. Exciting. And it's free. What could be better?
I can now use Skype for the coaching, counselling, CBT and healing. It's just brilliant.
Hope to see you soon....................
Healing your body
Thursday 8th of April 2010
I believe that we all have the power to heal our bodies. I have seen how small changes in how we live our lives can have huge affects on the quality of our lives.
For example- a small change in diet- sometimes it's the dairy, sometimes it's the wheat, sometimes it’s just too many calories- just starting here can make you feel so much better. Eliot (my husband) and I started something interesting last autumn. We are both quite sporty and eat healthy, we don’t drink any alcohol or fizzy drinks- these are just lifestyle choices we’ve made for ourselves over the years. Anyway, we decided to look at how many calories we are putting in our bodies on a daily basis. It came out of a conversation we had with friends where one friend said that we would be horrified if we knew how many calories we were ingesting. I said that I thought it was probably within the normal range because we are both quite healthy.
So Eliot and I decided to test ourselves. I do the cooking so I investigated how many calories in our meals- all meals are home made. We soon began to realise and yes, were horrified at how many excess calories we were taking in. Just from ignorance. I had no idea how many calories are in food. We used to eat handfuls of prunes at a time for a healthy snack. One handful is 400 calories and we were eating these all day. Then we also ate many bananas- again 110 calories each time.
Women are meant to have around 2,000 calories per day. For men it’s 2,500. I was eating about 3,000 a day and Eliot anywhere from 4,000-5,000. Neither one of us were overweight but I think that’s mainly down to the fact that we exercise a lot because if we hadn’t been and we were eating so many calories we would have been huge. Absolutely.
So, we have naturally reduced our calorie intake and we both feel much better. Those little tummies that have been hanging around for ages are now gone. I tend to thrive on about 1700 calories a day and I have a lot more energy because of it. Eliot needs about 3,000 per day but he is also quite tall and he burns a lot more calories through mountain biking and other intense sports.
Just that one thing- looking at our calorie intake has made a huge difference in our lives. We are healthier, have more energy, our thoughts are clearer- just overall positive results.
Healing by reducing stress
Friday 15th of January 2010
I have tried to design my life to have as little stress as possible. I have seen how stress leads to illness and disease. Stress kills if left untreated, unresolved for any length of time. If I am feeling stressed about something I ask myself "Is there anything I can do about this?" If there is, then I do it. In many cases there is something that can be done. It might be something that makes us uncomfortable- like a conversation that needs to happen that we've been avoiding which has built up stress. But once that conversation takes place- it can immediately release stress.
Last week we were tested to our stress limits. Our power was off for almost 48 hours and we couldn't leave because we were under two feet of snow and the council doesn't clear snow around here. That really tested us. Being cold without any way to warm yourself can really do something to a person. Thank goodness I had Eliot here to go through the experience with. We would go outside to shovel the snow because it actually warmed us up. I'd like to say that the community really pulled together around here to help each other- but that didn't happen.
When the power went off we thought it would only be a few hours but when it went into the evening, the night and then the next day- it was awful. But the constant question was always- what can we do to change this situation? Eliot put the BBQ together to cook some food. I tried to make the house as comfortable as possible. We just did what we could. We went to a friends across the valley for lunch, warmth and comfort. We were hugely relieved when the power came back on but since then, no landline and BT can't get here anytime soon- over a week now. So, stress. Can I do anything about it- no. They'll get here when they get here- I've had to let that go.
So, when feeling stressed, ask yourself if there is anything you can do to change this situation. If there is then do it. If there is absolutely nothing you can do then you need to let it go- it's out of your hands. It's not as simple as that but the message is stress kills- do what you can to alleviate stress.
The healer in you
Tuesday 8th of December 2009
Take a minute and think about this. If you are not happy- who is to blame? Who is responsible for our happiness? Do we blame it on our parents because we had a lousy childhood?
Maybe we were sent away to boarding school at a young age, we felt unloved by our parents or unwanted, and it left deep scars inside of us. Or what about that bully at school who used to torment us and beat on us. Can’t he be blamed for our low self-esteem twenty years later?
What about the girl who told us we were fat and ugly when we were ten years old? Let’s blame her for our negative view of ourselves.
What about so many horrific things that have happened to all of us along the way- along our lives journeys? Some of us have had truly horrible things happen to us- surely we can blame our failures, our unhappiness, our ill health- all of these can be as a direct result of something terrible that we experienced in the past- right? Wrong.
Of course our past reflects our present. Of course it does. But there comes a time in our lives when we absolutely must stop blaming the things that have happened to us and LET THEM GO. FOREVER.
There are too many times when someone comes to me for healing and all their unhappiness is blamed on significant things that happened in their past. Different forms of abuse and suffering. But by holding on so tightly to the blame, the hatred, the anger they are simply extending the pain and suffering. Some people have been holding onto things for forty, fifty years. Its time to let go.
I do realise that this isn’t easy to do and I am not trying to be flippant- far from it. I am just saying look at your life. What negative memories and thoughts are you still hanging on to? What are you allowing to get in the way of your happiness? Look at these things and begin to let them go. These things happened in the past, leave them there. Move forward. Take your happiness back. You are an adult now. It is time to be responsible for your life. Stop blaming.
What has happened in the past, it happened. We cannot change what has already happened but we can change how we live now today and into the future. None of us knows how long our lives will last and in my healing work I work with many people that have been diagnosed with terminal illnesses. There is no time to waste or put things off. Live life now.
Healing with kindness
Wednesday 9th of September 2009
My father taught me many things as a child that have stayed with me as an adult. I was raised on "random acts of genuine kindness". I remember coming home from school and instead of being asked what I learned at school that day he'd ask me who I was able to help that day.
He was an amazing man, my father. Much of who I am today comes from his early teachings. Sadly, he died when I was a teenager. Looking back now, I realise how much he taught me in our brief time together.
I continue to teach people about random acts of genuine kindness. Live in the moment and be aware of what is happening around you. There will be many opportunities. You'll be surprised how you doing something for someone else will make you feel- it might take less than a minute but the affect of it could last much longer.
Try it and see how it makes you feel. It certainly brightens my day. It could brighten yours too, and someone else's.
Healing by changing our thoughts
Friday 21st of August 2009
Each of us has, on average, 60,000 thoughts per day- every day. It is a fact- scientifically researched and everything. Think about it- no pun intended.
How many thoughts just slide in and out without us being aware or conscious of them? Now, imagine if out of your 60,000 thoughts today- imagine if 59,987 are negative. Defeating, sad, angry, blaming, thoughts about lack, about not being good enough, how terrible your relationship is, how you never have fun, etc., etc., etc and so on. Whew- that many negative thoughts must make it difficult to get out of bed in the morning.
Now, what if every single thought that we have affects our physical body in some way? So what if those 59,987 thoughts that are negative are putting negativity into our bodies? Ouch.
On the other hand- what if we are very conscious of what we are thinking every moment and what if we are having 60,000 thoughts per day that are positive? What positive affect will that have on our body? Amazing.
A suggestion- keep two journals. One journal is for writing in your negative thoughts. One journal is for your positive thoughts. I’m not suggesting that we are able to catch all 60,000 thoughts but if we can be more aware and manage our thoughts better and change them into something more positive- just imagine how much better you will feel.
Healing your cognitive distortions
Tuesday 30th of June 2009
In using CBT to help clients I often give them this list of what Beck has identified as the most common cognitive distortions (negative thoughts). By identifying these, the client can then move on to challenge and generate more adaptive (healthy) thoughts. Have a read and see which ones you use.
All or nothing thinking- Placing experiences in one of two opposite categories.
Over generalising- Making sweeping inferences based on a single incident.
Discounting the positives- Deciding that if a good thing has happened, it couldn’t have been very important.
Jumping to conclusions- Focusing on one aspect of a situation, when forming a judgement, or deciding what the data means.
Mind reading- Believing one knows what another person is thinking, with little or no evidence.
Fortune telling- Believing one knows what the future holds, while ignoring other possibilities.
Magnifying/Minimising- Evaluating the importance of a negative event, or the lack of evidence of a positive event, in a distorted manner.
Emotional reasoning- Believing that something must be true, because it feels like it is true.
Making should statements- Telling oneself one should do, or should have done something, when it is more accurate to say that one would like to do (or wishes one had done) the preferred thing.
Labelling- Using a label (stupid, useless driver) to describe a behaviour -and then imputing all the meanings that the label carries.
Inappropriate blaming- Using hindsight to determine what one should have done even if one could not have known the best thing to do at the time. Also, ignoring mitigating factors, or ignoring the role played by others in a negative experience or event.
Honey that is healing cancer
Monday 15th of June 2009
I have been told by many people, one a dear friend, about this honey that can help to heal cancer. Through-out my career as a healer I often hear of miracle cures- eat this, drink this, do this.
I have been blessed to have been involved many times with clients where the cancer has been healed, gone into remission, tumours have shrunk and/or disappeared. So, there is no doubt in my mind that cancer can be healed. I believe that all illness and disease can be healed- I’m unshakeable on that. I don’t believe that is true in every situation or with each person but I am seeing many similarities in the cases where cancer has been healed.
I have been told of this honey that when taken on a regular basis has been able to help heal cancer. It is called Life Mel Honey. I will give the web site address in a moment but I want to make it clear that I am not responsible in any way nor am I connected to this company in any way and I don’t receive anything from them for telling people about the honey. I've also just been told that Life Mel honey can also be purchased from the health shop Aromantica in Dorking.
Life Mel main contact information is - Click hereContact them either calling 0207 247 5497 or e-mailing Click hereAlternatively, please write to Terri Barnett at:-
Holywell Health Products Ltd
22 Holywell Row
London
EC2A 4JB
UK
Healing by changing our behaviour
Wednesday 10th of June 2009
I work with clients on helping to identify their negative patterns and habits. Then I teach them how to accept responsibility for these habits and then we go on to change and release these patterns and habits. One of my clients sent me this.
Autobiography in Five Chapters by Portia Nelson
One
As I walk down the street,
There is a deep hole in the sidewalk.
I fall in.
I am lost….I am hopeless.
It isn’t my fault.
It takes forever to find a way out.
Two
I walk down the same street.
There is a deep hole in the sidewalk.
I pretend I don’t see it.
I fall in again.
I can’t believe I’m in the same place.
But it isn’t my fault.
It still takes a long time to get out.
Three
I walk down the same street.
There is a deep hole in the sidewalk.
I see it is there.
I still fall in….it’s a habit.
My eyes are open.
I know where I am.
It is MY fault.
I get out immediately.
Four
I walk down the same street.
There is a deep hole in the sidewalk.
I walk round it.
Five
I walk down another street.
A possible motto to live by.
Thursday 4th of June 2009
I went to a lovely tea room in Dorking yesterday with a friend and this quote was on the wall. It made me laugh and so I thought I’d share it with you. The author is unknown. I’m just posting it here.
Life should not be a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in an attractive and well preserved body, but rather to skid in sideways, chocolate in one hand, wine in the other, body thoroughly used up, totally worn out and screaming “Woo hoo- what a ride.”
Wealth Consciousness
Friday 22nd of May 2009
I often coach clients that are dealing with money issues, or lack of money issues. The subject comes up most days and I refer to this poem that someone gave me years ago. I have no idea who wrote it but I think that what it says is worth much. I have met many people that don’t have a lot of money or possessions but they are truly wealthy. Gratitude is always a sign of someone who knows their own wealth and abundance. Generosity is also something often seen in someone with wealth consciousness. A joy and appreciation of life is also part of it.
I have also met people with loads of money, big houses, all the “things” and yet been so poor in themselves. True poverty consciousness exists often within people with loads of money. The never enough, never happy, never satisfied. Always searching, buying more things, looking for whatever it is that they think will fill that emptiness inside themselves.
The poem says, “Wealth consciousness is so much more than simply having the ability to make money. It’s a mindset that involves seeing life not as a struggle but as a magical adventure where our needs are met with grace and ease. Wealth consciousness is a state of mind, a sense, not of believing, but really knowing that what we need is available to us.”
I believe that happiness is what really matters. True happiness is worth more than money and much rarer.
Our thoughts create our reality.
Sunday 17th of May 2009
What we focus on- grows. What we resist persists. Good, bad, ugly- whatever we are thinking of on a regular basis we attract more of. If we focus on not having money, we won’t have any. Our thoughts create our reality. Try it and see what happens. If you are constantly thinking, “no-one loves me” than you will get that reflected back to you. If you are constantly thinking, “People really like me. I’m a likeable person.” That is what you will get back. If you keep thinking you are fat- then you are because that is what you believe about yourself.
Look at your thoughts- really look at them. Write them down. I have clients keep journals- one for their negative thoughts and one for their positive thoughts. We know we are progressing when the positive thought journal has more entries than the negative thought journal. Watch and listen to what you are thinking and if these thoughts do not reflect what you want in your life- then change these thoughts immediately.
Someone called me a Pollyanna the other day. I didn’t know what it meant so I asked Eliot. He said it was someone that is always happy and smiling. I like that. I am not always happy- of course not. However, I am happy a lot of the time. I make an effort to find beauty in every day things and to focus on these things. I never read the paper or watch the news. I used to get sad and felt lousy after watching the news- no more. If I feel that I have put on some weight- then I do whatever I can to lose it.
I smile a lot and people smile back. This is a good thing. I hug people whenever I get a chance and I tell them I love them often. Give out what you want to come back to you. What goes around comes around and the one of the laws of karma is that what you send out comes back to you times ten. So if you are being an angry, nasty person- watch out. If you are being a loving, caring, kind person- enjoy.
The meaning of life.
Tuesday 10th of March 2009
I’m often asked my opinion as to what is the meaning of life. Why are we here? I’ve thought about this and I’ve had some grand ideas- we’re here to save the planet from destruction (too late I’m afraid); we’re here to learn to love everyone equally- a bit challenging that one; and many other possible reasons why we are here. I’ve come to my conclusion and I believe that this is the meaning to life and why we are here. The reason is- to be content, to find contentment. I truly believe this is what we should aspire too. It might sound simple. Too simple. You might think you already have that. But do you?
Contentment is a gentle peaceful feeling inside that is always there regardless of what life throws at you. It includes joy and happiness and love (much love). A wonderful feeling of being alive to live another day. The deep courage in oneself to know that any challenge that comes to us will be met with peace and understanding- not drama, stress, anger, upset.
Contentment includes happiness but isn’t necessarily the same as happiness. Who can maintain true happiness every second of every day? Contentment isn’t about trying to be content; it’s just being content in a natural state of being. It includes doing work you love, being in loving relationships that nurture and support, living in an environment that brings you joy and peace. It includes and involves so many things but then it would- we wouldn’t want the meaning to life to be simple, would we?
The Secret by Rhonda Byrne
Friday 20th of February 2009
What is it about the Secret? This book gets mentioned to me at least three times a week by different people. I read it a few years ago and I really enjoyed it. Everyone I knew at the time was reading it too so we had some good conversations. I just heard the other day that it is the number one best selling book in America and has been for some time.
I did enjoy reading it. It makes a lot of sense to me. My mum watched the DVD with me last year and she said that I had been telling her these things for years. Mainly about changing the negative thoughts into positive ones and how the negative thoughts and emotions can bring illness and disease to the body.
The DVD is great too although can be a bit “hyped” in moments but the actual information is very beneficial and the people in the film help explain how to put these ideas and thoughts into action. It gives good advice and life skills that can help you make positive changes in all aspects of your life- prosperity, health, relationships, and happiness.
I recommend both the book and the DVD often to clients and have given many of both of these as gifts to friends and clients. I keep both the book and the DVD nearby and they never fail to inspire and motive me.
Healing in the New Year
Tuesday 27th of January 2009
Time is passing quicker that it ever has. This is how it feels to me. It doesn't seem so long ago that it was January 2008 and now we are already almost finshed with the month of January 2009.
This means that we don't have time to moan over our problems- we need to take action to make the changes. As more time passes it means more days wasted not living the life that we want to live. Make the changes- they don't have to be big changes, but they can be.
Make a list- what isn't working in your life? What do you wish was different? Are you with the right partner or do you live in dread when you know that person will be coming home? If you can make positive changes within the relationship, then begin now. If you can't and you find yourself in a destructive relationship, then find a way to move on.
If you dislike the work you are doing- do some home-study or find courses near you and learn about something different or find someone to train you as an apprentice. So many things are possible but if you don't go out and look and put effort into it then it will be January 2010 and you will be EXACTLY where you are now.
Why this healing works.
Saturday 17th of January 2009
It works so well because it affects all levels at the same time- emotional, physical, mental and spiritual.
I had a client come the other day that had a personal development day with me. She came specifically for the coaching- to help make positive decisions in her life. When we were setting up the schedule for the day, I had asked her if she wanted healing and her response was, “only if we have time at the end.” I made sure we had time at the end and she really enjoyed the healing experience. She did not want to leave. She said she had never experienced anything like that.
Then, on the other hand, I recently had a Relate counsellor come to see me to heal some physical things. Again, each session was divided between the coaching and then the healing- even though she was clear that she was coming only to heal her body. We soon found that there were deep emotional issues from many years ago and the coaching helped heal those and then the physical hands on healing healed everything at once. After five sessions, things were healed. I remember as she was saying goodbye for the last time she turned to me and said, “the hands on healing is extraordinary, but the spiritual life coaching is what really helped me move forward. It was the combination of everything that really helped me.”
I do believe that our thoughts and emotions are affecting our bodies. A new client that has recently begun healing sessions with me- we are working on healing cancer- I asked her the other day how many of her thoughts are negative, on average, and she said, “all of them.” Then I asked her how many of her thoughts on average were negative even before she was told she had cancer. Her response, “all of them.”
Why do some people heal and others don’t? Those that are committed to the healing process, those that stick with it, those that make the positive changes in their lives- both small changes and more significant changes- all of these things contribute in the situations of when people heal. I see it all the time. If something is wrong on any level than that is a clear message that positive changes need to be made. Many times the positive changes aren’t easy but let’s face it- what do you have to lose?
What is an affirmation?
Monday 12th of January 2009
An affirmation is a positive statement about yourself or a situation, that involves you, and it is expressed using present tense. Affirmations send positive messages to your brain and these are used to negate or over-ride previous negative messages.
For example, there are some people that think that they aren’t very intelligent so they think to themselves, “I am stupid”, and they think this over and over again. This causes damage on many levels and in many different areas of their lives. If someone thinks they are stupid and they are constantly repeating this to themselves then this will greatly affect their self-esteem, their motivation, their relationships, etc. They won’t have the confidence needed to make positive changes in their life-
In this situation I would teach my client the affirmation of- I am smart or I am intelligent and I would have them say it repeatedly. There is great power in the repetitive word.
In my work with my clients one of the first things I do is define what negative thoughts they have running through their mind. Once we establish this we can then create affirmations that will change their way of thinking to a much more positive sense. The affirmation is used to change the thought and the energy behind the thought.
We create our future right now, in this moment, with the words we use and the thoughts we choose. Affirmations are most effective when stated verbally and with true intent. You should always believe your affirmation, although this can be quite challenging at first but stay with it and the positive nature of the affirmations and the thoughts and energy behind them will bring many positive changes into your life.
Often, I have clients face themselves in the mirror and repeat affirmations while watching their facial expressions. There is often laughter and many times tears. Affirmations do bring up a lot of things to look at it. One of the most powerful affirmations that I have used with clients is, “I am beautiful.” It always surprises me what horrible things people choose to think about themselves deep down inside. This is where the healing begins.
One client told she had been called ugly through-out her childhood. Over time she began to believe it. It wasn’t until she came for a healing session- and that was for something else- that she started to become aware of so many of these negative thought patterns running through her mind. When she finally realized that she was beautiful and that it was ok to be beautiful, she completely transformed. We are all beautiful and we all have our own unique beauty that needs to be celebrated.
Here- try it yourself- what is something you don’t like about yourself? Too fat, too thin, too short, too tall. No money? Let’s take that one to begin with.
Negative thought-
I am broke, I’m skint, I’m poor, I have nothing
Suggested affirmations-
I have many blessings. I prosper wherever I turn. I am prosperity and abundance. My income is constantly increasing.
Negative thought-
I hate my job. I hate my work.
Suggested affirmation-
I have now found the job that is perfect for me. I am now working at the perfect job. My work is creative and I enjoy it very much. My job is perfect for me.
Just as we all have our own unique beauty we also deserve to have happiness, joy and love in our lives. Everyone deserves to be happy, it is your right as a human being so choose it!
Affirmations should always be present tense- in this moment now. "Want" in an affirmation doesn’t work, this sends out a message that you "want" something – you can go on wanting forever. If I say I want a new house, I will still be “wanting” that new house when I am 100 years old. I say, “I am now living in my beautiful new house.” Choose what you “want” in the here and now and affirm it into being. Our power is always in the present moment, we can't change the past, but we can learn to let go of it.
Each new day you have the power to change that day.
I do affirmations every morning while I’m doing yoga. I begin my day with these affirmations -
I am love. I am loved. I am perfect health. I am wise. I am kind. I am happy. I am prosperity and abundance. My life is full of happiness and joy. I love my work. I am blessed. And so many more…………..go ahead, use some of these if you want. But whatever you do- get started with your affirmations.
Christmas and all that jazz.....
Friday 5th of December 2008
Here comes Christmas again and I am loving it! My husband is not a big fan of Christmas as he sees the material and commercial side of it all but he puts up with it because he loves me. We bought our trees last Saturday and it was freezing cold and pouring rain. Less than ideal conditions. We go to a local tree farm every year and they have the Christmas music playing and reindeer running through-out- I find it wonderful but even I have to admit the weather conditions weren’t so great. Now if it had been snowing…………..So there I am singing Christmas carols and there is Eliot valiantly trying to be part of the adventure when all he really wanted was to be home in front of the fire reading his FT. Bless him.
I see so many wonderful opportunities at this time of year. We have the darkest month of the year and we have the ability to celebrate with lights, and music and joy and love and friendship. And food- let’s not forget all that delicious food. What is December without a few extra pounds on our bodies?
Each year, I see December as my month to resolve things, to forgive people, to forgive myself and to let things go. It is the end of another amazing year and I want to leave all the baggage and negativity in 2008 and not bring it in to my beautiful new year. I want to plan for the future, set up new goals, what did I achieve this year, what do I want to change about myself, what relationships are not healthy and need to be let go of. So many searching questions to ask myself. December is such a full month, such a spectacular month, such a month full of opportunity and growth. Enjoy, embrace and begin to make those positive changes. New year is a new you- if you want it to be.
Happy Christmas from our home to yours.
Cancer- how to heal.
Friday 2nd of May 2008
I was just speaking to someone on the phone about cancer. She has a friend and also her mother who are both working on healing cancer. Ten years ago I would only have a few clients coming to me with cancer, now; I would say at least half of the people that come to see me have cancer. Why is it on the increase and what do we do to prevent it and if we have it- how do we heal it?
I realise this is a very sensitive issue and so please know that anything I’ve written here is only my opinion and it is based on my own experiences- it doesn’t mean it will be the same truth for everyone else.
In the cases that someone has come to me and has been healed of cancer the following things have taken place. Emotional issues have been healed. The source of the cancer- why is it there- this is often connected to some deep emotional issue that has been buried and has been eating away at that person. A deep anger, resentment, hatred, jealousy, fear, rejection, abandonment- something that has been buried deep and ignored. These need to be looked at and healed.
Then, the physical condition of the body. What can we do immediately to improve things? Smoking, drinking alcohol, junk food- any and all toxins must be removed from the diet. I’m not saying permanently but while the healing of cancer is taking place we need to do all that we can to help the body to heal and adding additional toxins isn’t going to help.
Hands on healing for the body. As much as possible and as soon as possible. I have seen miracles happen when a body that has been battered with toxins, chemo, radiotherapy and many other toxins- when the body received natural healing it is like a sponge soaking up as much as it can as quickly as it can.
So many people take their bodies for granted. Filling them with rubbish both with food and with thoughts. Our bodies aren’t impervious and over time these things will make us ill. And that’s not even getting into what our environments are doing to our bodies. I think the overall message here- live a life as healthy as you can in every way.
A great weekend.
Monday 28th of April 2008
I just had a great weekend. The sunshine on Saturday and the mixture of rain and sunshine yesterday- it was so invigorating. We saw different friends over the weekend and that was a lot of fun. Just a lovely weekend.
We went for a long walk yesterday in the Surrey Hills and seeing the buds on the trees and the blossoms- the magnolias are gorgeous. It was sunshine one minute and pouring rain the next but no-one seemed to mind. As we were walking and talking I realised that my focus shouldn’t be on losing the last of this weight but more on having fun and being healthy. The walk was challenging with a few big hills and they were really hard work but I didn’t notice because I was with friends chatting and the scenery was very beautiful.
One friend mentioned recently that her personal trainer has told her to take up running and that she should do this at least three times a week. But the thing is, she hates running. So guess what- it has already been set up to fail. If you hate running then don’t run. Find something else. I suggested what I do- the combination of yoga and then hill walking. The yoga strengthens and elongates the muscles and the hill walk gives a great aerobic exercise.
I have developed a new way of walking that I call conscious walking- a way of using the mind, body and spirit at the same time while exercising. I teach people to be very conscious of their thoughts- many are negative- and then while walking we work on releasing these negative thought patterns. I have been teaching clients to do this and it has proven very effective. Its fun and because its fun, people enjoy it and it will entice them out to exercise. Find something that you like to do and just do it. It is a good idea to exercise at least 3-4 times a week. Have fun with it.
Teaching teenagers healthy cooking.
Friday 25th of April 2008
I just had a really fun day- hard work, but fun. I do something that I call Kitchen Therapy- which is teaching people how to cook simple and easy recipes that they will enjoy and that are very healthy for them. I first find out what their favorite foods are and then I create recipes for their favorite foods but in a much healthier, more nutritious, less fat way.
I also work with people that have food phobias and people that have eating disorders. I have a great love of food and I enjoy sharing that with others. Today I worked with a teenage girl who came to me to learn how to cook before going off to university later this year. She has been anorexic in the past and has recovered from that but there are still food issues that need healing and understanding. So I designed the day to fit her needs and we came up with some foods that she really enjoys and I showed her how to prepare them and what fun cooking really can be.
It was just great fun and we laughed a lot, talked a lot and just really enjoyed the day. My Kitchen Therapy is a lot of extra work for me and so I don’t do it often but I do really enjoy it when I do. I also showed her how to make my very healthy blueberry pancakes for something sweet but healthy. It has been a very satisfying day. A rewarding day.
Live your life now.
Monday 21st of April 2008
Six years ago I had the amalgam fillings removed from my mouth. At the time I wasn’t aware of mercury poisoning and how dangerous and deadly it can be. The dentist didn’t take any precautions and so I ingested quite a bit of metal into my body. That night I remember feeling something on the tip of my tongue and when I looked I saw a large piece of metal. So I can only imagine what was in my body.
What followed was a journey into hell with me getting more ill every day and in and out of hospitals and doctors not being able to tell me what was wrong. It was a dark time in my life. One of the many side effects of the mercury poisoning for me was that some of the mercury had lodged in my thyroid and I went from size slim to size really not very slim at all. It didn’t matter what I ate- healthy or not- I ballooned. This was difficult for me as I have always had a slim body as I’ve always done a lot of sports. But my energy was non-existent and my thyroid was contaminated so my body didn’t know what to do.
This illness and the consequences taught me many, many things. But one thing it taught me was to live life each day as it comes and find joy in that day. Do things that I want to do. I shut myself off from the world for a few years during that time of illness and also I was embarrassed at what my body looked like and I just didn’t want any of my friends to see me like that or to meet new people who would think that that is what I’m usually like.
It was a horrible illness and quite frightening. My husband used to wake me in the night just too make sure I was still breathing. He was an absolute saint during that time and had to do a lot to take care of me as I was helpless and fading fast. But many good things came out of having that illness. I learned how to cook and I fell in love with gardening. I learned to slow down my fast pace and live life at a slower speed and with a lot more consciousness. Eliot (husband) and I became very close and our relationship became something extraordinary and it still is, even more so I would say.
Overall, when faced with death I realised how much I loved life and I fought with everything I had to survive. I have an intense appreciation of my life now and every day is a gift. Even the cold, grey rainy ones. When clients come to me in pain and suffering I help them find something, no matter how small, that they can look forward to each day. And we build on these positive things until there is more joy during the day than pain.
Its time to lose that winter weight- again.
Friday 11th of April 2008
My husband and I are both working hard to lose that winter weight. It’s a bit challenging, as the weather still hasn’t moved into spring yet- as we just had five inches of snow only a few days ago. But we are working on it anyway. Moving more towards soups and salads and less of the stodgy winter foods.
We both believe that being healthy when we are younger will set us up for good health as we get older and help the aging process be less painful- literally.
Exercise is so important. I insist on getting my early morning walk in the forest- that sets me up for the rest of the day and keeps me energized. I recommend yoga to all of my clients- regardless of age. One of my favourite clients is 79 years old and he has started doing some gentle yoga stretches. Regular exercise- it doesn’t have to be extreme but do it on a consistent basis and something that suits your lifestyle and body type.
Eat healthy as often as you can. I’m the cook here at home so I try to incorporate as much fruit as I can and add vegetables to pretty much everything I make. We both try to do 100 sit-ups and crunches each day to help with the stomach muscles. It sounds like a lot but its over in five minutes. Neither one of us drinks alcohol or smoke so that really helps with being healthy too. It does take some effort and its not just about losing weight. It’s about being healthy and feeling great with loads of energy which leaves a much more positive outlook on life.
Our winter garden
Monday 7th of April 2008
I was relaxing in the garden last Friday with the sun on my face and it was 26 degrees in the sun. Then yesterday, Sunday, we woke up to snow coming in the window. I didn't get to do what I had planned to do in the garden but we still had a lot of fun. It was a beautiful day.
My Parkour clients
Saturday 5th of April 2008
Three of the women in the video below are clients of mine. I have had the pleasure of doing some healing for some women that are Parkour athletes. First I have to say- they are lovely. I don’t know if Parkour attracts only lovely people but these three women that I know that do Parkour are just really lovely human beings- a real pleasure to know.
These women are athletes. They are amazing. I have always thought that the human body is a miracle and very beautiful. When I see an athlete- someone who trains and is fit- I am amazed by it. It’s the human body at its best. Strong, muscular, fluid- just beautiful. My body isn’t like that and it wasn’t like that in my early 20’s either. The exercise I do is gentle and I do it because I get so much joy out of it- yoga, and hill walking in the forest. But I couldn’t do the Parkour. It is hard core and very demanding. And you have got to be sharp and so in tune with everything aspect of your being. The people who do Parkour are passionate about it and I can understand why.
I’m fascinated. I’m spell bound. How do they move so fluidly over obstacles that many of us would find insurmountable? How do they jump and land safely on a rail 2 inches wide? How do they run up a wall twice their height? How do they do these things? Ever since I first saw people doing Parkour in France years ago, I have been fascinated. I don’t understand how they do it but I’m seriously impressed that they can do it. To see the Parkour video on You Tube please go to this link Click hereand to my clients that are doing this amazing sport- LONG MAY IT CONTINUE.
Bring on the sunshine.
Friday 4th of April 2008
Today was meant to be sunny and warm. The weather woman said it would be. It is that heavy grey sky with the torrential rain. Haven’t we had enough rain yet? Can’t we take a break and have a few weeks of spring with the sunshine and the warmth? Plants in my garden have been washed away with all this rain. Bring on spring now, I’ve had enough of this. Just as I wrote that last sentence, the sun broke through the clouds. Spooky.
I’m off to do my yoga now- that always helps break the grey heaviness. And when I’m doing my healing work with my clients, I don’t even notice the grey. That is a very good thing when living in the U.K. And to think I used to live in sunny southern California- and I missed the seasons.
I love living in the U.K. - it’s my home and I wouldn’t want to live anywhere else. I think it is one of the most beautiful countries in the world- and I’ve seen quite a few. It’s a very special place to live and I’m honoured to be here. The one thing, the only thing I would change if I could, would be to have warmer, sunny days. I know we need both light and dark and we need the rain for things to grow but we also need to feel the warm sunshine on our faces. We need that vitamin D that only the sunshine can bring. In eager anticipation……………….
I am in the garden.
Wednesday 2nd of April 2008
I fear my blogging days are limited over the next six months as I will be spending every free moment in the garden. We moved here five years ago and the garden was a mess. It hadn’t been touched in 20 years and the nettles were taller than my husband. Glass, bricks, rubbish- pretty much everything lived in those nettles.
The first year here was spent just cleaning things up and getting new plants in. I’m a novice gardener and am completely self taught. I battle every day with the numerous rabbits and deer that love to eat my plants. And it is physically hard work. And I love it! I just love it.
My healing work is quite serious and can be very demanding. People come to me in pain- physical, emotional, mental and it is my job to help them get well. I sometimes work with people that are suicidal and that can really take a lot of my energy.
So, my garden is where I heal. At the end of the day there is nothing better than to be in the garden with the birds singing all around me and watching those same deer and rabbits from a distance and just feeling at peace with the world.
Love is beautiful.
Tuesday 25th of March 2008
I've just spent the four days of the Easter holiday with my husband and it was so beautiful. We are so close and there is so much love between us- it is such a blessing. I have been in relationships before and if asked, I would have said "yes, I love this person" but it wouldn't have been anything like this.
Eliot is such a rare individual and he is exactly perfect for me. Within himself he brings so many things to our relationship. There are many times in the past that I could have happily settled into one of the relationships that I was involved in- thank goodness I didn't because I wouldn't have this now and I've had it for six years.
The other day I was speaking to a client about her relationship with her husband and I just asked one question- do you love him and she couldn't say yes and when we spoke further she said that she married him because she was so afraid to spend the rest of her life alone.
I was the opposite- I was determined to spend the rest of my life alone unless I met a man so perfect for me. I refused to settle for less than everything that I wanted. But I also know if I hadn't met Eliot I would have spent my life without a partner and been perfectly happy.
Its all the big things and its also the little things. It was snowing Easter Sunday and I dragged him out of the nice warm bed into the freezing cold and we built a snowman. We were out in the cold for over two hours and it was such great fun.
Experts saying even organic chicken is not a healthy option.
Thursday 13th of March 2008
I’ve just been reading about the high fat content in chicken- even organic chicken. I recently discovered a beautiful organic chicken farm in Devon and I ordered some chickens from there- Click here.
They have really delicious turkey, chicken, lamb, etc. I’ve been getting our turkey and lamb from them for years and thought I’d try the organic chicken. It was without a doubt the best chicken I have ever tasted in my life. Delicious. I just roasted it with some fresh herbs. But I did notice something as it was cooking- there was a lot of fat in the pan. And it surprised me as I knew it was organic and I’ve always thought that organic chicken has a lot less fat. But even though it surprised me it didn’t stop us from eating it again- we love it and will continue to eat it.
But today I’ve come across a few articles about Professor Michael Crawford and his research into the fat content of chicken- both battery chickens and organic. Please go to the following link to read more of the article below- Click here
"Britains favourite meat is getting fatter. Despite its healthy image, researchers have found that the modern chicken contains nearly three times the fat it did 35 years ago. The fat in a typical British bird now outweighs its protein, according to a study by a London university, and a single serving has up to 50% more calories than it did in the 1970s. The idleness imposed by factory farming methods is being blamed for soaring obesity levels among chickens, a problem that affects conventionally and organically produced meat."
What about friends?
Sunday 2nd of March 2008
I recently had a discussion about friends and what is expected of someone who is a friend. The person I was talking to was saying how she never hears from certain friends and that when they phone to make plans that the other person is always too busy and that it could be months before they can meet up. I said that that is how it is with me.
It could be months before I can meet up with someone, and in some cases years. I don’t miss people when I’m not with them. I love them and I think of them but I don’t miss them. There isn’t any great need to ring them or meet up soon but this doesn’t mean that they aren’t important to me.
This discussion got me looking at my life and what a friend is for me and who my friends really are. I know a lot of people and I have a lot of acquaintances but these aren’t friends. There are a lot of people that I enjoy seeing but again, this doesn’t mean they are a friend. I had to ask myself, why don’t I make more time for certain people? Is it me? Is something wrong with me?
I did some real soul searching on this one. What I’ve realised is that I am blessed with a very beautiful and full life. I’m also someone who needs to have time by myself- my morning yoga and walking in the forest. Without time for me I would go a bit nutty. So there is that.
Then, I work most of the day and that fills up my days. I work some evenings too- when Eliot is away. And we both work every other Saturday. Sundays are sacred and they are always just for the two of us. So basically that leaves two Saturdays out of a month to see someone- to meet up socially.
I would say that all of my closest friends understand this and they let me be me. They don’t judge, they don’t get upset because we won’t meet up for awhile. But when looking at their lives, theirs are very similar and so there is a mutual respect on how we live our lives. The time I do have with my beautiful friends is precious and full of love and laughter so I would have to say, for me, friendship is more about quality than quantity.
Eat to save your life.
Wednesday 27th of February 2008
There was a program on channel 4 recently where Jaime Oliver presented different reasons and facts on how important it is for us to eat healthy and to exercise. If you can get a copy of this- I highly recommend it. It is a very important program to watch.
The program is called “Eat to Save Your Life” and it was on channel 4 the 20th of January. I watched it first by myself and then encouraged my husband to watch it with me. We are both quite healthy- get regular exercise and eat healthy foods- probably 90% healthy and 10% anything and everything. (I enjoy that 10% immensely). But we could also both lose a few pounds, especially after the winter stodge.
The program showed the frozen cadaver of a 28 stone man and they had sliced it down the middle so you could see where all the fat was. They also did an autopsy and they showed everything. It was difficult to watch and I definitely felt squeamish but once we got past that it was both fascinating and frightening. The amount of fat that this man was carrying around was…..well, awful.
They had many people on the program and each one had their health analyzed with different tests and the results were quite scary. Just because you’re slim doesn’t mean you are healthy. The slimmest woman on the program had the most amount of fat around her internal organs. One man that was a bit overweight had less fat in his body that a much younger and slimmer man. Put it this way- this program was a real eye opener for both me and my husband and I would hope for anyone that watches it.
I’m a fan of Jaime Oliver’s. I think he has done a lot for the encouragement of healthy eating and healthy lifestyles. And he continues to do this. But this program mentioned above is truly his best work yet. I’m greatly impressed.
My fish pie.
Sunday 24th of February 2008
My fish pie has become a little bit famous and friends are always asking when I'm making my next one. I also teach the recipe to clients that come for cooking classes in my kitchen therapy sessions. One woman who never cooks brought one of these home to her family and her husband actually cried with happiness. But part of that is that she hasn't cooked anything- ever.
I will write the recipe soon but for now I can tell you this is the healthiest fish pie that has ever been eaten. The only fat in it is 2 tablespoons of goats butter used in the roux (white sauce). I've found healthy alternatives to replace the cream and other butter and fattening bits. And I don't even have to poach the fish in milk- I have a much healthier way of poaching the fish.
Recipe to come soon.
I never thought I would do this.
Wednesday 20th of February 2008
This blogging- I never thought I’d do it. A good friend first suggested it to me over a year ago and I wasn’t interested. I don’t have much free time and when I do have it I want to be walking in the forest, not sitting in front of the computer. But the other day this same good friend suggested it again and I thought why not. I’ll try it and if I don’t like it or if it begins to feel like work- I’ll stop. Easy.
I am blown away by what has happened since. We only went live on my web site with this a few days ago and the response I’m getting is incredible. I never expected that.
Lovely responses- people saying they’ve tried the meditation and it works, same thing with the deep breathing- that it really does help people to relax. One person wrote to me- someone who suffers from panic attacks- and he said that the deep breathing that I suggested has really helped him. Someone else made comments about how blessed I am to be happy and that my blog inspired her and not to listen to people when they criticise my happiness.
It’s exciting. I’ve always wanted to share the knowledge that I have, the experiences that I have had and the different ways to help people to heal themselves. I feel that the more healthy and happy people we have on the planet- the better off we all are.
Please keep the comments coming. I’m going to see what I can do to make this live and more interactive. More to come.
Photos from this morning.
Saturday 16th of February 2008
It was the most beautiful morning. I took a couple of photos to remind me. What a difference the frost makes.
For the record.......
Friday 15th of February 2008
I wrote the coupe de foudre blog BEFORE I received these 50 beautiful red tulips- and he hasn't even seen that blog yet. What a gorgeous man!
Le coupe de foudre.
Thursday 14th of February 2008
My husband is in Dubai for the week and he has only been gone two days and I'm missing him. Part of me thinks its ridiculous and another part of me thinks this is how it should be- that deep missing him. He is so important to me and such a big part of my life that of course I should be missing him.
It was "le coupe de foudre" for us. Having lived in Geneva for many years and speaking and listening to French I couldn't help but know of "le coupe de foudre" which loosely translates to struck by lightening and love at first sight. I had never thought that I would experience it and yet I did.
Six years ago to be exact. As soon as I saw him, I knew. I knew he was the one. I have had it confirmed over and over again. He is my best friend beyond anything I have ever known. He is an amazing person who can make me laugh when it has been a challenging day and laughter is far away. He still makes my knees go weak when he walks through the door. He is the best man I have ever known and I am so blessed to have him as my partner. Il est mon coeur pour toujours.
Say hello to my darkside.
Sunday 10th of February 2008
I just had a very interesting conversation with a client. This woman fascinates me. She has so many interesting ideas about people, life, philosophies. We always go overtime when she is here- so much to talk about.
Today we talked about one of Carl Jung’s philosophies related to the dark side. Recognizing that the dark side is a part of us and acknowledging it and living with it. This got me thinking- is everyone capable of violence? I believe we are. If someone was threatening a family member or friend of mine, or me for that matter- I would do what was necessary to protect them or me.
But having said that- if I saw a stranger in trouble or being hurt in some way I’d have to try to help. I couldn’t just stand by and watch someone be harmed- I couldn’t live with myself. It drives my husband mad. He calls me his little ferocious tiger rushing in to help and putting myself in danger. Rubbish.
I remember walking across Battersea Park, London years ago with my friend John and he said to me that I was insincere because I couldn’t possibly be as happy as I seemed or acted. I was stunned. I didn’t realise that being happy was so threatening to others. I think that being a healer probably has a lot to do with it. I have a constant source of love and healing energy that is accessible to me and I use it, tune in to it on a regular basis, so of course that is going to have an affect.
But I also know and recognize that these opposite co-exist inside of me. Of course they do. I have light within and I also have dark. I am able to love and I can also be not so loving. I am a human being with all the complexities that everyone else has. When I’m having an argument or fight with my husband, there isn’t much sign of the light side of me.
But this is why I think we need to acknowledge and recognize all that is a part of us. I can recognize who I am being when I’m having an argument with my husband and the anger that is inside me and then I can make myself stop- if I want. Or I can continue. In some situations being angry has saved my life- an incident when travelling around India years ago- I was attacked and the anger was so strong that I got myself out of that situation. That anger has helped me many times- I wouldn’t want to be without it.
I studied Carl Jung when I was at university and this recent conversation has reminded me to go back and read more again and maybe even give Freud another chance.
